As I begin this new year of life - a new calendar year and a literal new year of life as my birthday comes on January 3rd right at the beginning of the year - I'm doing alot of thinking. I've felt a bit at lose ends since quitting my very daily job as worship pastor in 2009 to do mission work. I've felt like I was floating along, doing periodic mission trips but feeling no true purpose in my day to day life. This led to moments of acute depression and a feeling that my life was literally passing me by and nothing I did mattered. I felt paralyzed.
In the fall of this year I had a cancer scare. It ended up being benign but just thinking of the possibility of having a fatal illness made me really think of what I wanted in life - of what was important. I knew some things had to change.....
So as I approached 2012 , I resolved to take steps forward. I have recognized that I have to take charge of my life instead of waiting for things to "happen". I knew I had to take steps of action based on what I really want in my life and what I feel God has called me to do.
So I applied to go back to college, signed up for a weight loss and exercise program and made my list of goals for 2012 - and to do all this I will need one thing I struggle with. I will need
Discipline is simply an activity or regimen that improves a skill, the act of training.
So that is my word for 2012 - Discipline. I pray for the discipline to get up with purpose each morning and to make each day count. I pray for the discipline to take steps forward even when I feel that step might not matter to anyone but me.
Because I feel like God is preparing me for something - and it will require my disciplined obedience in this season of my life.
I will need all the encouragement I can get so please pray for me!